There’s no shortage of meat in this town. And while I do fancy a good steak or a BBQ feast, there’s nothing better than a cheeseburger to satisfy my meat tooth. Narrowing down the burger joint choices in Austin can cause some unwanted anxiety, though. I think I found the solution: letting my mood dictate the burger.
Smug = Jacoby’s
Admit it. You love to brag about living in Austin to your Facebook friends. So when they come to visit, go into full peacocking mode by taking them to the newest, must-visit hotspot: Jacoby’s Restaurant and Mercantile.
The menu is short, polished and perfected. The sole burger on the menu is the Half Pound Cheeseburger with Hand-cut Fries. And oh, is it impressive. The beef that goes into the burger comes from healthy, happy cattle raised by the Jacobys on their family ranch. It’s an uncomplicated burger that relies on flavorful, tender and juicy meat. Minimal accoutrements needed. Honestly, you could even skip the cheese – it gets overshadowed by the real star of this meal: the beef.
3235 E Cesar Chavez Street – Visit Website
Spiteful = Lambert’s of Austin
Your significant other just picked a nasty fight with you. Here’s how you end it: Go to Lambert’s by yourself. Sit at the bar and order whiskey, straight up.
Take your time before you order the Oak Grilled House Ground Cheeseburger. Let the knee-weakening aroma that is Lambert’s soak into your clothing. “Accidently” drop some of the smoky-flavored burger meat on your shirt. Then, just go home and let your partner smell you. Trust me: This life-changing burger will win this fight for you. And if it doesn’t, break up with that idiot and head back to the bar at Lambert’s, where there is no shortage of pretty people.
401 W 2nd Street – Visit the Website
Confident = Jeffrey’s of Clarksville
You approached the week like a boss. You got it done, did it again, tried it sideways and slayed it, and then showed the minions at your office how to do it, too. In short, you are a champion.
You deserve the Dry-aged Prime Wagyu Burger at Jeffrey’s. Topped with onions caramelized to perfection, creamy cambozola cheese, spicy mustard and horseradish mayonnaise, this statement burger pairs perfectly with steak fries and a smooth pinot noir. Cheers to you.
1204 W Lynn Street – Visit the Website
Guilty = Hopdoddy Burger Bar
Ever feel like you’re cheating on your favorite food? Sometimes I feel like I owe veggie lasagna a chance….Sometimes I feel like the salmon with vegetables will make me feel better about myself….Never does, though.
Non-burger food items just make me feel like a dirty, rotten cheat. But the la Bandita Burger at Hopdoddy Burger Bar is the best of both worlds: heathy and satisfying. It’s a meat-free, black bean and corn patty on a grainy whole wheat bun, topped with fresh avocado, goat cheese, cilantro pesto and arugula. I leave the chipotle mayo off and swap out the goat cheese for feta. Amazing.
1400 S Congress Avenue and 2438A W Anderson Lane – Visit the Website
Regretful = Bacon
Sure, dancing on the bar at the Chugging Monkey sounded like a fantastic idea at the time. Calling your ex at 2 AM also sounded like a swell idea, but your head is pounding and you feel miserable.
Only one thing will cure you – the Double Grind Burger at Bacon. This tasty beast consists of ground steak and bacon melted together in a harmonious blend. It’s topped with red onion, a juicy tomato and fresh romaine. The mayo choices are nearly as impressive as the beef: bacon aioli, chipotle or their tangy secret house mayo. Adding bacon and cheese will cost you an extra $1.50 of absolutely worth it! Later, hangover.
900 W 10th Street – Visit Website
Of course, there are plenty of other amazing burgers in this town. And for the record, all of the above burgers can be savored when you’re feeling happy. Or sad, or mad or just plain hungry. So let us here at the Austinot know your favorite burger joint, and we’ll get out there and try it. Maybe we’ll even let you know what we thought in the next burger showdown article. If you can’t wait to salivate, check out Austinot Founder Eric Highland’s series on the best burger joint in Austin.
@TheAustinot wants to know:
What’s your favorite burger in town? What mood do you have to be in to thoroughly enjoy it?
JD says
When I am feeling totally suicidal…DQ is what I go for. It’s the stop sign of Texas, ya know.